#people want answers and at the same time don't

[ssentimentals]

prompt: this is reader’s first relationship & she’s just a little unsure of herself & how to be in a relationship?

seungcheol + inexperienced!reader

it's not a big deal. thats what you've been trying to tell yourself since seungcheol became your boyfriend. your very first boyfriend in your very first relationship. it's great, amazing and it's not.a.big.deal. if only your mind was so easy to trick.

'baby?' seungcheol calls over and you turn so quickly, you give yourself a whiplash. he raises one eyebrow at you, frozen with a big bowl full of popcorn in his hands. 'is everything okay?'

you gulp. you're doing a horrible job of not showing your insecurities if seungcheol can tell that something is wrong by standing five feet away. 'everything is fine,' you lie and it sounds so fake that you can't stop yourself from grimacing.

that, of course, only worries seungcheol even more. your boyfriend comes over, carefully placing full bowl on the floor before climbing on the sofa next to you. he doesn't get anywhere in your personal space and instead reaches out to take your hands in his. 'what's wrong?' he asks in such an earnest tone that you feel bad.

you almost want to tell the truth. your mouth almost opens, your tongue almost curves and forms the words that haunt your mind. almost. you draw back, swallowing hard. how can you tell the truth to someone like seungcheol? someone so confident and sure in himself, someone for who this relationship is not anything new; how can he understand you? you know that you're overthinking it. so many people told you that it's not a big deal and you agree, but what can you do if your mind always comes up with hundred and one ways to make you unsure in this whole thing? seungcheol's thumbs caress your skin gently and he waits so patiently for your answer that it makes your heart squeeze painfully in your chest. it also serves a good reminder - this is seungcheol. same seungcheol who held your bag and chaperoned you to every single class. same seungcheol who memorized your food allergies and favorite snacks, always checking labels of everything for any allergens and surprising you with sweets whenever you're least expected them. same seungcheol who took his time to know you, kept respectable distance till you got comfortable, waited for you to develop feelings for him as well. same seungcheol who looked the happiest when you agreed to be his girlfriend. it's the same seungcheol and you breathe out, willing your whole body to release the tension you've been holding.

'it might be a bit stupid, you warn, biting your lower lip.

seungcheol shakes his head. 'it's not, it won't be. share with me, baby. i can help, i promise. and if not then it at least will feel good to get this thing out of your chest.'

you smile. somehow he always knows what to say to make you at ease. 'i'm just worried, i guess.' you let out slowly, being careful with words. seungcheol nods, urging you to continue. 'like- ugh.'

it's unexpectedly hard. how do you tell him that being in relationship for the first time makes you nervous? that even during simple movie night you feel unsure on how to act? that your mind is clouded with 'what should i do' and 'am i suppose to do this' more often than you'd like to admit it? in the end, what ends up coming out of your mouth is: 'you're my first boyfriend and i'm just worried about... this.'

seungcheol waits for a little but when it becomes clear that you're not going to elaborate, he carefully asks: 'i'm not making you uncomfortable, am i?'

you shake your head, gripping his hands. 'no-no, cheollie. you don't.'

'alright,' seungcheol sighs in relief. 'but if i do - please tell me, okay? this is new for me too, i need to know if my actions somehow upset you. it's not going to work without a good communication.'

you blink. this is new for me too leaves you breathless. god. of course it's new for seungcheol too - he never dated you. you are a new person and it's new for him too, he doesn't know everything about you. he is also in this for the first time with you and this realisation makes you want to laugh. 'i had the most ridicilous thoughts,' you confess, chuckling a little. 'like- like how i can be good girlfriend.'

seungcheol looks so confused and baffled that this time you laugh for real, letting your head fall forward on his shoulder. 'are you serious? babe, looks at me. c'mon, show me your pretty face.' he makes you look up, cradling your face in his hands. 'are you serious?' when you nod shyly, he groans. 'oh my god. what on earth- baby. i am with you. i am dating you. we are together. i am so happy, why are you even thinking about this?'

you blush under his stare. 'cause you know that this is very new for me, i don't want to fuck up or something like that.'

'just be yourself.' seungcheol says it with so much conviction that you don't doubt his sincerity. 'just be you, i fell for you, i don't need anything else. we will move on your pace, don't worry about it. you can do whatever you want to do, act however you like - just be you.'

it takes a gigantic effort from you to not cry. you hug him tight and seungcheol hugs you even tighter right back, plastering himself all over you and leaving tiny kisses on your shoulder and head. his words fill you with so much warmth and relief, you sag in his arms. 'thank you,' you mumble.

'you don't have to thank me,' seungcheol whispers. 'just be you and you'll be the best girlfriend on this planet.'

it's cheesy and it makes you giggle and feel all of the butterflies in your stomach. you kiss his cheeks, sighing happily. 'okay.'

seungcheol smiles, caressing your back lovingly. he lets you two enjoy this moment, only pulling back when you move. 'now let's go back to our movie night, yeah?'

you nod. 'cuddle?' you ask shyly.

seungcheol's answering grin is blinding. 'of course, princess.'

a/n: is it very obvious that seungcheol is in my top3 of the members to write for? :') hope you enjoyed this one! - nini

my other seventeen works are HERE

[butts-bouncing-on-the-beltway]

I am not EVERY autistic person so this probably won't be a total coverage approach, but here's what I have learned:

People like to feel that you pay attention to and remember little but important things about them. And when someone is "small-talking" with you, it is often because they either want to offer you some of that info about themselves, or they want to pearn it about you so they can "return the effort". I think of it a bit like call and response with my cats! They don't understand me, and I don't understand them, but when I walk into the kitchen each morning, Lup runs towards me excitedly making her tiny little squeaks and trills. That's kitty small-talk! Many words of all varieties just say "I love you! I missed you! I'm happy to be here with you today!"

So I answer her! Sometimes I mimic her little sounds, and other times I pretend we're gossiping like church ladies (*gasp* NO, you're KIDDING, he said THAT?? What a scandal!") But whichever I do Lup gets excited and continues her little "conversation" with me.

People are harder. I had to really take time and practice different ways of responding before I found appropriate "call and response" for small talk, but I found that there are genuinely more options than you'd think. And the same thing happened! As I learned how to "call and respond" to small talk, I found that people would excitedly approach me to have it, and gradually we got to know each other enough that the "calls" coming from both sides got less general, more tailored to our personal preferences and interests, and I didn't have to small talk as much (but when I did it wasn't as scary either)

This isn't just my personal theory either! A fair amount of research in interpersonal/social in-group dynamics suggests that "bids for attention" like small talk function in this way of call-and-response intimacy/connection building. I have found that a LOT of social etiquette gets less scary to navigate when I at least understand the function of it. It also gave me some understsnding of why people might be hurt when I visibly don't WANT to "respond" to a "call" they've made: I'm the same way about my "calls" I just use different ones! The way I feel when I ask someone "would you want to hang out with me in the kitchen while I make lunch?" (Sad, a little anxious or vulnerable, maybe hurt if they've said no to a LOT of recent calls, etc) is the same way others feel when I decline theirs! That doesn't change if it was MISSED rather than DECLINED, but it can be repaired! Ao another thing I've taken to doing is naming for people the calls I have learned I'm most likely to miss. I know I have a hard time understanding/recognizing small talk as a call to attention, so I let people know that! And generally the people I connect best with are the ones who notice I missed a call and offer me an explicit/direct opportunity to reject it before internalizing what I've done as a rejection. This isn't really an option for everyone! And while I'm always delighted when someone is compatible with me in that way, I don't get upset if they're not, and work to not take it personally as something I'm doing wrong either.

Anyway, this got rambly at the end there, but the point is, most social interactions have a FUNCTION and while being autistic frequently means that we struggle to learn and interact in these systems as they currently exist, but that doesn't necessarily mean that we don't also depend on those functions. I think it can be easy to forget that part of the "disabling" effects of social/communication symptoms in autism is how it cuts us off from systems of support, care, and human interconectedness (things we still NEED) and it can matter to our quality of life to be able to find compatible alternatives to fulfilling those functions even if the original mechanism (small talk in this case) doesn't suit us.

Being bad at small talk doesn't mean you don't need friends, but it will probably make it very hard to MAKE friends. And we each and all deserve to decide for ourselves what to do about that.

I'm trying to figure out a good way to say "you really should actually learn the basics of small talk" with sounding like I'm biased against autistic people.

[covenofagatha]

Sex Ed (Part 2)

Agatha has a few more things to teach you

Word count: 3.3k

Warnings: oral sex, inexperienced reader, only slightly manipulative Agatha

Taglist: @lostbutlovely33 @diorrxckstar @whoreforolderfictionalwomen  @katekathry @onemansdreamisanothermansdeath @tayasmellsapples @natashashill @mybraininblood @mysticalmoonlight7  @cactuslover2600 @loveem0mo @readysteddiero-nance @lonelyhalfwitch @lesbiantortilla @crescendoofstars @sol-in-wonderland @ahsfan05 @gbab09 @sasheemo @agathaharness @live-laugh-love-lupone @chiar4anna @fuckedupforkhahn @lowlyjelly

The next day when you have Agatha’s class, you don’t really know how you’re supposed to react to seeing her, to being that close to her. 

Every time you’ve thought of her since you took the make-up exam, your stomach has grown hot and that same slickness between your legs comes back. 

You tried to deal with it yourself last night, but you couldn’t. Your fingers just don't feel the same as hers do. 

And now you have to go sit through another one of her lectures. You can only hope that since you already took the test on anatomy and sexual intercourse, she’ll be moving onto a new topic so she won’t drive you crazy. 

Except you can’t get her teaching you about sex like she did out of your head. Was it a one-time thing? Are you supposed to pretend like it didn’t happen? How are you supposed to look her in the eyes after her fingers were inside you? 

How will she act? You know she’s your professor and realistically won’t behave any differently, but you can’t help but want her to. 

You get to the classroom about ten minutes early, hoping to talk to her a bit. She hadn’t said much once you resumed taking the exam yesterday and had only given you a “Thanks, honey. See you tomorrow.” when you turned it in. It was a little jarring, but you suppose it was just her being professional. 

Agatha isn’t there yet so you take your normal seat, foot bouncing on the floor, and wait. The door behind you opens a few minutes later and you whirl around, expecting to see your teacher, but it’s just another kid in your class. You offer him a tight smile and turn back to the front. 

It gets closer and closer to the start of class, and with two minutes to spare, Agatha finally strolls in. She’s wearing a long yellow skirt that brushes against the floor when she walks and a long-sleeve black top. Her hair is loose and falls to her mid-back, wavy and a bit frizzy, and the mascara she’s wearing makes her blue eyes look icy. 

Your mouth runs dry and your stomach twists and starts to grow warm, the feeling that has now become familiar whenever you’re near her flooding through you. 

She drops her bag on her chair and surveys the room. You try not to squirm when she finally looks right into you and you swear you can see the hint of a smirk on her face. And then she starts to rummage through her bag and slams a stack of papers on the desk, making everyone jump. 

“Some of you did well on the test while some of you did not. It seems like we might need to go over some things.” 

You gulp. Did you not do well? You wrote down everything she said — everything she did — to you. 

“First things first,” Agatha says, grabbing one of the exams and flipping to the second page. “What are the benefits of oral sex?” 

A wave of relief crashes over you. You didn’t have that question. 

But it makes your brows furrow. You don’t remember her saying anything about oral sex in the lessons. Do people really use their mouths…

Agatha must see you looking confused because she gives you a wink and it makes your stomach heat up. How is it that just a single look from her can make you feel this way? 

It would be almost frustrating if it didn’t make you feel so good. 

“Oral sex can lead to higher orgasm rates, alternatives to penetrative sex, enhanced intimacy, and improved sexual satisfaction,” Agatha answers after no one raises their hand. “Some people like oral sex more than penetrative sex, actually.”

You can feel your cheeks flushing. Her fingers felt so good inside you — would her mouth on you feel even better? 

And what would it be like to taste her? 

The image of you between her legs, mouth on her and making her moan, runs through your mind and it’s all you can think about now. Do you just…lick? And would you be able to make her feel as good as she made you feel? Since yesterday, you’ve found yourself wishing you had a little more experience. 

Some people like oral sex more…is she one of those people?

You have to swallow hard and force yourself to pay attention to her lesson, but it’s so hard when you can still feel her skin against yours as she taught you about sex. It was a lesson, nothing more, but you can’t help but want to do it again. 

Agatha keeps going over some other commonly missed questions — none of them were on your test, thank goodness — and then she starts a new topic: contraception and sexually transmitted diseases. You find yourself zoning out and watching the way her fingers curl around the dry-erase marker rather than actually paying attention and taking notes. 

Before you know it, she finishes her lecture — you’re not sure you actually comprehended any of it — and she sits down in the chair before addressing everyone. “If you want to see your test, come see me after class. Otherwise, I’ll see you on Thursday.” 

Practically everyone jumps out of their seats and speeds out the door. It’s only you and another student that stay behind and you let the other girl look at her test first while you pick at your fingernails nervously. You can overhear them softly talking about something the girl messed up on and Agatha starts walking her through the question. 

You have to make an effort not to clench your thighs together. Why is your professor’s voice having this much effect on you? What has she done to you? 

And then the student leaves and it’s just the two of you. Your heart starts to race and you can feel excitement pulse under your skin. 

Agatha smiles at you while you walk towards her desk, feeling like you’re moving through molasses. 

“Um, can I —” You take a deep breath when your voice comes out as a croak, “Can I see my test?” 

You’ll look at it and then go. 

Look at it and then go. Look at it and then go. 

It becomes your new mantra. You’re not going to say anything stupid, and you’re especially not going to bring up the fact that she’s awakened something inside you and you have no way of dealing with it. 

“Of course, hon,” she says warmly and sifts through the exams until she finds yours. You do notice that the test on top, the one she read off the question about oral sex from, is blank. Maybe it’s an answer key? She sees you looking and chuckles like she knows something you don’t. 

Agatha isn’t sure you’d understand that no one had that question; it was just a way to get the idea in your head. She knew none of her students would think twice about it — except for you. 

She finally finds yours and hands it to you and an immense feeling of relief crashes over you when you look at it. 

You got a one-hundred. 

“Great job, honey. Glad to see my little lesson paid off,” she jokes, winking when you look back up at her, and heat floods through you and settles in the pit of your stomach. 

You flip through the test and note her little scribbles of feedback about how well you explained something or how detailed you were. “Thank you,” you whisper hoarsely. If she hadn’t helped, you surely would’ve failed. 

Now would be the time to hand the paper back to Agatha and then go back to your dorm. But you can’t move. You shift your weight between your legs and chew on your bottom lip. 

What are you doing? 

“Everything okay?” she asks and you nod immediately. 

“Yeah,” you answer, still staring at her. She slouches back in her chair and spreads her legs and the vision of kneeling between them hits you like a train. You let out a little sound involuntarily. 

It’s like she can see right through you and she smirks. “Is there something else?” 

I can’t stop thinking about oral sex is what you almost say. It’s taken up almost all of your thoughts the entire class after Agatha planted the seed. “Um,” you start, pleading with your eyes for her to understand. 

She glances back down to the paper with that question on it and then back up to you, realization dawning on her face. “You want to know what having someone go down on you feels like?” she asks matter-of-factly like that doesn’t just shake your entire world to the core as you sharply inhale.

“Yes —” you breathe before even thinking about it. Your ability to think coherently is rapidly decreasing by the second. “Well, I, um — you said that some people like it better than penetrative sex. Do you?” You can’t stop your voice from wavering when you say it and she looks absolutely delighted. 

Agatha leans forward and rests an elbow on her desk while she rakes her eyes over your body. “It depends. Good oral sex? Fuck, yes. Having a pretty girl’s tongue in my pussy is better than anything else.” 

Your knees almost buckle and the ache inside you becomes almost unbearable. Can she see how flushed you’ve become? “Oh,” you squeak out and she laughs. Would you be good at it? 

Better yet, could you make her feel good?

“What’s wrong, honey?” She simpers. “Do you want me to show you how it feels?” 

You almost say yes immediately, but something stops you, and she raises an eyebrow at her hesitation. “Could you, um — could you teach me?” you ask timidly and she beams like she just got everything she’s ever wanted. 

“Of course, darling. You’re such a good girl for wanting to learn,” she gushes and the praise makes your mind go foggy. 

Agatha slides her chair back and tilts it so she’s facing you before slowly pulling up her long skirt. When it gets above her knees, it’s as if you become entranced and you drop to the floor in front of her and put your hands on top of hers. She pauses, studying you, waiting for you to do something. 

Your heartbeat throbs in your throat and you lean forward and press your mouth against her kneecap, suddenly just needing to feel her skin. She lets out a small gasp and her hands grip onto her dress. 

Both of you guide the fabric up even more until it’s around her waist, your lips trailing open-mouth kisses against her thighs in the wake. 

“God, baby,” she sighs and it makes you melt. “Your mouth feels so good.” 

Purple lace comes into your view and your brain short-circuits. The crotch of them is damp and dark and you forget how to breathe. Lubrication. Part of the excitement stage. 

Agatha wants you. 

The thought drives you absolutely wild and you feel your own core get even wetter. 

She shifts so she can bunch her skirt all the way up under her and you press your mouth against her underwear, making her jump. You can smell her through the fabric and you can’t stop yourself from running your tongue over it. She lets out a small gasp and you do it again. You can taste her, too — a somewhat sweet, musky taste — and you moan. 

Her hand gently pushes your head back and then she reaches down to pull her underwear off and you help her slide them down her legs. 

When she settles back into her chair, you get your first look at her and it almost overwhelms you. 

She is so wet. 

“God,” you whisper under your breath and then look back up at her, doubt creeping into the edges of your mind. What if you don’t do a good job? 

Agatha must see your anxiety and she cups your face. “Don’t worry, honey. I’m going to tell you exactly what to do. Just follow my instructions and you’ll be fine, okay?” 

You nod and she smiles reassuringly before sliding a finger through her folds to part them, revealing her entrance. You don’t think you could look away if you tried. 

“Why don’t you start by licking?” she suggests and you take a deep breath before following the same path her finger just took with your tongue. At the first touch, Agatha whimpers and it spurs you on. “Just like that, baby.” 

Starting to feel more confident, you start to explore by dragging your tongue up and down through her folds, just taking her in. You find that she really likes it when you stroke the inside of her folds with your tongue and you do that a few times, feeling her get even wetter. 

“Find my clit at the top,” she says and you locate it a moment later, a swollen little nub, and lick it, maybe a little too roughly. She hisses. “Gently — circle around it at first.” 

You do as you’re told and she moans. Her hips have started moving slightly, like she’s trying to get more, and you want to give it to her. Your eyes flick to her face just to make sure she’s enjoying herself, and you find her already watching you, pupils blown out, hungry. Her bottom lip is between her teeth and her chest is rapidly rising and falling. 

She must be the hottest woman on the planet. 

“Perfect, now thrust your tongue inside me,” she says, except her voice is uncharacteristically high and it makes you even more desperate to please. 

Her walls clench around your tongue the moment it enters her and it makes you moan. Her wetness is smeared around your face now, but it just makes you want to get even more messy. Something about having the proof that you’re getting her close to an orgasm is really doing something to you. 

Agatha’s hand slides into your hair and tugs on it gently, directing your mouth back to her clit. “Suck on my clit, honey,” she rasps so you envelope it with your lips and suck and her back arches off the chair. “Fuck — you’re a natural, baby, you’re such a quick learner.” Your clit pulses. 

You feel emboldened now, knowing that she likes it, that she really likes it, and you flick your tongue against her clit a few times, back and forth, side to side, and then you lick through her folds again while she starts to rut against your face. 

You try to think back and remember the stages of the orgasm that she talked and fucked you through yesterday, but you can’t remember a thing — all you know is that you’re tasting Professor Harkness and you’re making her feel good. 

Her hand tightens in your hair and you groan into her. Your entire body is on fire, heat coursing through your veins and making you ache for her and you wonder if you touched yourself now, if you could get yourself to an orgasm. 

“Baby, right there — god, your mouth feels so good,” Agatha babbles, her hips moving furiously. Your own hips start to make short, frantic motions to get any stimulation that you can. “Open up and hold out your tongue,” she orders gruffly, sounding urgent. 

Whimpering, you stick your tongue out as far as you can and flatten it and she pushes herself out of her chair and stands over you so that your head is tilted up. You have to hold her dress up so you can still see her. 

With one hand in your hair to keep you in place and her other hand firmly grabbed onto her desk, she rolls her hips against your tongue, grinding her clit down over and over while she grunts with the effort. You can feel her throbbing. 

Her wetness coats your tongue and drips out down your cheeks while you let her use you and she starts to get sloppy. 

“Yes, angel, you’re gonna make me cum,” she whines. “Look at you, so pure and innocent, that pretty mouth full of my cunt. Should just keep you under my desk at all times so you can eat me out whenever I want.” 

Her words spark something inside you and you moan loudly, the vibrations against her making her rhythm falter. Agatha tries to say something else but fails and she completely falls apart all over your tongue, liquid gushing all over you. 

She slows down her movements until she finally steps back and falls into her chair, running a hand through her hair and fluffing it. 

You swipe a hand over your mouth and it glistens in the light of the classroom. “Did I do a good job?” you ask and Agatha tosses her head back with a laugh. 

“Yeah, honey, you did a really good job. Why don’t you get up on the desk and I’ll show you how it feels?” 

It takes you less than five seconds to sit on the desk and spread your legs, your short skirt riding up. You can feel how absolutely drenched your underwear is and you wonder if you’re making a mess below you. 

But then Agatha scoots over in her chair and her hands dive under your skirt to take your panties off and you couldn’t care less. She spreads your legs and gently blows against you and it makes you keen. 

Her arms reach around you and land on your ass to pull you closer to the edge of the desk and you put your feet on the armrests of her chair so she can get better access. Your heart is pounding as she leans down and at her first lick, you have to hold onto the desk. Her tongue slides inside you and curls. 

God. 

This is so much better than her fingers. 

The sound that tears itself out of your mouth is somewhere between a strangled moan and a gasp and she huffs out a laugh which only makes the pleasure intensify. 

You’re already so worked up — you’ve been excited since you came to class and it only got worse when you made her orgasm, and you can already feel yours building. 

Agatha says something, muffled by you, and then she sucks on your clit and pleasure skyrockets through you, making you gasp loudly. The tension that you felt for the first time yesterday grows, wounds tight in your stomach, and it’s going to snap at any minute. 

“Agatha, I’m going to —” you moan but you’re cut off by her taking your clit between her lips and thrashing her tongue against it and the dam inside you breaks, relief to the ache you’ve had for so long finally flooding through you. 

She keeps lapping at you like she’s not letting a drop of wetness go to waste and you eventually have to pull her away because you’ve gotten too sensitive. 

Her chair rolls back before Agatha gets up and helps you off her desk onto shaky legs. “So?” she prompts and you heavily exhale. 

“That was…really good,” you say, and you know you’re never going to get the feeling of her hot tongue against you out of your head. Especially when you’re sitting in her class, staring at her mouth and fingers that have both been inside you. 

Agatha smirks and licks her lips in a poor attempt to clean her face. Her cheeks are still shiny, and you can still feel her wetness on your own cheeks, slightly hardened. “Well, anytime you want to learn anything else, just let me know,” she says with a wink. 

The dying embers in your stomach flicker back to life. 

You certainly will. 

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

Flirting anon again

Yeah but what if i fuck it up and hurt someone? It's all about pushing lines - is it inevitable that the learning process will push a line too far and hurt the other person? Oh wait no this is the self esteem thing again

so like in the vast vast VAST majority of cases, the worst thing you can do to someone by flirting is like. mildly annoy them.

like, let's be real here. what's actually going to happen? you've approached someone in the space of your choice, you're making small talk, getting to know a little more about them, you're liking the vibe. you ask "hey, would you want to get coffee together sometime?" and they go "oooooh, no thanks" and you go "cool, catch you on the flip side" and you move on. who got hurt there.

even if you get a little spicier and you're like, I don't know, seized with the spirit of courage and say "hey, could I kiss you right now?" and then go ":/ nah mate" like okay! asked and answered! moving right along! no one is being hurt here! you asked a question to give them an option, then (hopefully!!!) respected their answer and shimmied away; that's the ideal outcome.

talking to people is actually so so so so so much easier if you remember that causing someone a moment of irritation or discomfort is not in any way the same thing as harming them. I'm irritated and uncomfortable every single time I take public transit; that doesn't mean anyone is hurting me. the nature of humans interacting with each other is that we're all going to fuck up and piss each other off a little; that's not a crime. that's the cost of doing business re: being a social species.

[itsnesss]

HI may i request a junho fic where junho keeps seeing reader and arresting her and taking her into custody and she keeps saying “this is the last time you’ll see me” and then he arrests her like two days later and hes like “are you doing this on purpose?” and reader is like “maybe” and then it escalates from there into freaky time 🤭🤭

𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐞𝐟 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐩𝐨𝐥𝐢𝐜𝐞𝐦𝐚𝐧 | hwang jun-ho × fem!reader

summary | the request

warnings | criminal behavior (theft), smut, explicit content, p in v, unprotected sex

word count | 2.0 k

author's note | it would help me a lot if you liked, commented and reposted so that more people read what I write and don't forget to follow me, thanks ᡣ𐭩

You know what you're doing is wrong. You know it perfectly well. However, the risk and the possibility of being caught keep you moving. Your fingers graze the edge of a chocolate bar in a small convenience store. "It's no big deal," you tell yourself. A candy here, a poorly secured wallet there, always minor things. You don't need to do it, but something inside you pushes you.

You're about to leave the store with the chocolate hidden in your sleeve when you hear a familiar, firm voice behind you:

"Stop right there!"

Your heart skips a beat. It's him again. Slowly, you turn around, facing those dark eyes that seem to pierce you every time they meet yours. It's Officer Hwang Jun-ho, the same man who caught you a couple of weeks ago.

"You again?" he says incredulously, crossing his arms.

You smile as if it's some inside joke between the two of you.

"I guess I'm consistent, Officer."

He doesn't seem amused. His lips press into a thin line as he takes a step closer, making you instinctively step back. He observes you for a moment, as if trying to decipher your intentions.

"Hand over the chocolate," he says finally, extending his hand.

"What chocolate?" you ask with feigned innocence, raising your hands as if offended.

Jun-ho has no patience for your games. In a quick motion, he grabs your wrist and retrieves the candy from your sleeve. His touch is firm but not painful. You feel trapped, but not in a way that bothers you.

"You’re under custody for attempted theft," he declares, pulling handcuffs from his belt.

"Seriously? For a chocolate bar?" you protest, though you make no effort to resist.

He doesn't answer, simply leading you out of the store toward his patrol car. As you walk beside him, you can't help but notice him. There's something about his seriousness, the way his uniform fits his figure, that makes you want to provoke him even more.

The second time he catches you is at a street market. You're playing with a cheap keychain, pretending to be interested, when you "accidentally" slip it into your pocket. You barely take two steps before feeling a firm hand on your shoulder.

"Really?" Jun-ho says, his voice laced with incredulity.

You turn to face him, putting on your best innocent expression.

"Officer? What a coincidence."

He doesn't seem impressed. His gaze is stern, but you can see a spark of something else in his eyes. Maybe curiosity. Maybe irritation. Maybe something even he doesn't fully understand.

"Let’s go," he says, guiding you once again to his patrol car.

The ride to the station is silent this time, but the tension in the air is palpable. You can feel his gaze on you occasionally, as if trying to figure out your intentions. When you finally arrive, he lets you go with another warning.

"Don't do it again," he says with a seriousness that almost makes you feel guilty.

Almost.

The third time, you decide to be more obvious. You grab a pair of expensive headphones from a display case in a mall and head for the exit without even trying to hide them. It’s a bold move, but you know he’ll be nearby. And you’re right.

Before you can leave, you feel a hand on your arm, stopping you in your tracks.

"This has gone too far!" Jun-ho exclaims, his voice filled with frustration.

You turn to face him, trying hard not to smile.

"Oh, Officer, I thought we wouldn’t meet again."

He stares at you, his jaw clenched.

"What are you doing? Why do you keep doing this?"

"Why do you think?" you reply, leaning slightly toward him, invading his personal space.

Jun-ho seems thrown off for a moment, as if unsure how to respond. Finally, he leads you to a secluded alley instead of the station.

"Talk," he demands, crossing his arms. "Why do you keep stealing? You don’t need to do this. I know that."

You take a step closer, closing the distance between you.

"And what if I told you I do it for you?"

He blinks, surprised.

"What?"

"Maybe I like seeing you like this," you say, your eyes locked on his. "So serious. So frustrated. Maybe I want your attention."

Jun-ho studies you, his expression a mix of confusion and something deeper.

"Are you saying all of this was intentional?"

"Maybe," you murmur, leaning in even closer.

He grips your shoulders, his gaze searching for something in yours.

"This is insane," he murmurs, but he doesn’t pull away.

"Then stop me," you challenge, your voice barely a whisper.

Before you can say anything else, he kisses you. It’s an unexpected move, filled with all the tension that had been building between you two. It’s not soft or gentle, but it’s everything you hoped for. Your hands rest on his chest, feeling the rapid beat of his heart as the kiss deepens.

His hands, initially on your shoulders, slide to your waist, pulling you closer. Rationality takes a backseat as both of you get lost in the moment. No words are needed; everything is conveyed in the way his lips move against yours, in the way his hands hold you as if he doesn’t want to let go.

When you finally pull apart, both of you are breathless. Jun-ho looks at you with a mix of disbelief and something deeper.

"I can’t believe this just happened," he says, shaking his head.

You smile, still catching your breath.

"Maybe I should steal more often."

He chuckles softly, though his expression remains serious.

"You’re trouble, you know that?"

"And you seem to enjoy solving it."

Jun-ho sighs, but he can’t hide the small smile forming on his lips.

"This doesn’t change anything. It’s still my responsibility to stop you."

"Please do," you reply with a wink, knowing this won’t be the last time you provoke him.

Jun-ho takes a deep breath, trying to regain control. But his hands remain on your waist, as if he can’t bring himself to let you go. Suddenly, his eyes harden with determination.

"This is insane," he murmurs, stepping back. His hand moves to his belt, pulling out the handcuffs.

"What are you going to do, Officer? Cuff me?"

He doesn’t respond. With a swift and efficient motion, he secures the cuffs around your wrists. The metallic click of the locks makes your heart race even faster.

"Are you seriously taking me to the station for this?" you ask, but there’s a playful tone in your voice, as if you’re enjoying this turn of events.

Jun-ho studies you for a moment, and for the first time, he seems to hesitate.

"No. Not to the station."

"Then where?"

"To my apartment. We need to talk."

The seriousness in his tone surprises you, but you don’t have time to question it. He leads you to his car and helps you into the passenger seat, your hands still cuffed. The silence between you during the ride is heavy, charged with palpable tension.

When you arrive at his apartment, he helps you out of the car and escorts you inside. The space is neat, minimalist, but cozy. Jun-ho carefully removes the cuffs, his fingers brushing against your skin.

"Sit," he says, gesturing to the couch.

But instead of obeying, you step closer to him, challenging the distance he’s trying to maintain.

"Do you really think you need to do this?" you murmur, your words a whisper between the two of you.

Jun-ho closes his eyes for a moment, as if trying to gather his strength. But when he opens them, something in his gaze has changed. He grabs your arms, his grip firm but not aggressive.

"I don’t know what you do to me," he confesses in a low voice, his breath brushing against your skin.

"Then stop overthinking," you reply, leaning toward him.

This time, the kiss you share is even more intense than the last. The tension that had been building for weeks finally erupts in a whirlwind of emotions. His hands find your waist again, and yours slide up to his neck as you both surrender to the moment.

Without breaking the kiss, Jun-ho guides you toward his bedroom. The intimacy of his personal space only heightens the heat between you. The touches grow more desperate, breaths mix, and clothing begins to disappear, piece by piece.

Your heart races a thousand miles an hour, but there is no fear in it. Just need.

When you both fall into bed, you are aware that everything has changed forever. This is not just sex. It's much more. It's the culmination of all the times it caught you, challenged you to continue, gave in to your provocations.

When he positions himself over you, his eyes lock onto yours for a moment before taking his time. He positions himself between your legs, caressing them as he enters you. Both of you gasp, the pleasure simmering slowly inside you. Jun-ho's movements are slow, deliberate, as if he were trying to prolong this moment forever.

"I'm very close," he murmured softly, his teeth finding the lobe of your ear. "And you?"

"Yes," you whisper, your fingers digging into his shoulders as you both reach climax.

The pleasure that envelops you is overwhelming. It's not a simple orgasm, but a profound experience, something that changes you from within. They both stand still for a moment as the world readjusts around them. Then, their lips find yours in a soft kiss, but full of meaning.

Later, while they lie together in bed, their bodies intertwined, Jun-ho looks at you with an expression that mixes exhaustion and tenderness.

"This wasn't in the procedure manual," he says with a weak smile.

You laugh softly, caressing his face.

"Maybe you should write a new one" .

He sighs, kissing your forehead.

"You are a lost cause" .

"And you are completely stuck with me, officer".

[cherokeegal1975]

Makes sense. As a writer and artist myself, I gain inspiration from everything and everywhere. And creating stories and art is a kind of coping mechanism too. I get it even though I've never been in a war and hope I never will. I've got my own everyday battles. Everything from depression to people I really don't want to live with but have to pissing me off practically on a daily basis...and mostly preventing me from engaging in creativity of any kind...which is absolutely my drug of choice. It's maddening.

But, enough about my crap. What I have to put up with isn't as bad as what these two authors had to go through. I live with a guy I hate that I'd be surprised if he didn't have some form of untreated PTSD because he had seen some shit in Vietnam though he never actually killed anyone. But seeing people skinned and hanging upside-down and still breathing and having to guard them until his companions could get help to cut them down. I also heard that he got bombed once when he was sleeping. That shit would mess anyone up and he never recieved treatment for it.

I was understanding for a long time, but after a while, I just got angrier and angrier...I can' only put up with being called names and being mentally and physically abused (that part is rare, but it happens) without learning that I can indeed hate someone when for the longest time, I didn't know I could. Now I want nothing to do with him but I'm finanachally stuck in the same house with him until I can buy my freedom. Which is unlikely because I turn fifty this month and I've never been financially well off enough to leave as I desprately need to.

Asshole finished breaking my mom's sprit as much as it is possible to do to that stubborn bitch. Love her the most in the world, but still can't stand her and I hate living with her. She's fought her own wars too. So it wasn't all him, but he didn't help. He's such a bad husband and it's sad I can recognize that because I've never been married myself. Or romantically involved with anyone beyond a couple of dates. Those flopped...and I think in part because I didn't have enough information about myself. Never asked myself beyond am I gay or not...the answer was no. Then last year after some learning the question came up am I ace or not? Turns out the answer was yes and no...then I did some digging and came up with the term demisexual and that fit me.

And I'm breaking my rule about not bitching online. I have my own share of traumas. Still living them.

i think all quiet on the western front and the lord of the rings are in direct conversation with each other, as in theyre the retelling of the same war with one saying here’s what happened, we all died, and it did not matter at all and another going hush little boy, of course we won, of course your friends came back

[mysticheathenn]

Messages From Trust

Hi, Hexlings!

This pick-a-card reading is about what is preventing you from trusting others including yourself.

This is a general reading, remember to take what resonates and leave what does not. This reading does not supplement your need to seek for professional help. Tarot should be used as entertainment and not a for sure answer to your problems but as a guide, a sense of hope, and amusement. Only a private reading can give you a more tailored answer to your questions.

Take your time when choosing your pile. Ask yourself the question and choose the picture(s) that you can’t stop looking at. Listen to your intuition.

MasterList

Ko-Fi Donations

Patreon Link

Etsy (Private Readings)

Pile l:

What is preventing me from trusting others including myself? Tarot: Six of Swords, Ten of Swords, Seven of Wands, The Hermit, Everything is Fine, Nine of Swords

Abandonment issues. Something happened in your life to where you believe that everyone who enters your life is doomed to leave and for most of you, you tend to drive people away first before they even have the chance to leave while at the same time be sadden by your loneliness because you feel no one wants to be around you or even stay. When people do leave you overthink and go down a spiral thinking about the many things wrong with you when really there is nothing wrong with you at all, sometimes people leave and that's okay but it doesn't mean that something was wrong with you. It's actually the complete opposite. Others of you have been hurt so badly that you don't allow anyone in, you are probably that friend where it takes 3+ years just to know anything other than basic knowledge about you and even then sometimes your friends will try to get you to open up more even though you prefer to be the friend who is always there for others versus the other way around because again of this abandonment issue or because you feel no one really cares when really that's the farthest thing from the truth. You will never know love if you keep pushing people away from you because you fear of them walking away and even if someone does walk away it's not the end of the world. It may feel that way sometimes but everything as your card states is fine.

How to begin trusting others again? Tarot: Same Cards

Letting your guard down and accepting the outcome of what life brings. Accepting that people come and go and it has nothing to do with you. Accepting that you are amazing and those who choose to leave are missing out on the love and beautiful energy that you provide. Letting people in so they can show you that they do care and want to be there for you and are not there to pity you but because they want to see you succeed, thrive and most importantly they want to know you...the real you and not the sheltered mask version of yourself that you give others. Trust people not to hurt you, and read the signs so you know when to call a spade, a spade. If someone is not putting in the same amount or not even close enough effort to make you feel seen or loved it is okay to let them go but if someone is putting in the effort to get to know you and shows up in a way that you feel loved, please embrace it and don't shut down to push them away. You deserve to experience this kind of love and support in your life.

What good can come from trusting again? Oracle Cards: Truth, Confidence, Transformation, Love

For some of you, your abandonment issues stem from previous lovers while for others it's just friends or possibly both. Learning and deciding to trust again will open so many doors for you when it comes to love as well as who you are as a person. Some of you will rediscover who you are as a person because you have such a high wall up to the point you sometimes feel as if you don't know yourself. This will change once you begin trusting people again and doing the work to release this abandonment issue. Your confidence will also skyrocket along with seeing that the world indeed does not end when someone leaves as well as seeing that there is nothing wrong with you.

Pile ll:

What is preventing me from trusting others including myself? Tarot: Eight of Swords, Seven of Swords, Two of Swords, Eight of Cups, Knight of Cups

Self Sabotage. In the past or maybe even currently you tend to not want to see red flags in others to the point relationships or even friendships tend to drag on far too long until you get to the point of being tired and finally moving on. You tend to attract and go towards people who are not good for you whether they are just overall toxic, manipulative, narcissistic, or what have you. The people you tend to keep around you are never good and just a few of you if this is mostly romantic you tend to keep going back for them hoping that when you return to them that things will change when nothing has changed. A lot of the people who tend to be in your life loves to hand you an empty cup but the thing about that empty cup is because you have dealt with their lack of loving you properly the fact that they even brought something makes you giddy because it's the thought that counts. Unfortunately, all of these issues has led you to have trust issues. You don't trust yourself enough to see the good or the bad in people to the point anytime someone shows even one flaw or an ounce of drama you leave because you have been down this road before and never want to go back. You are done with the empty cups and lack of reciprocal energy from others, now anyone who breathes wrong you send them to the left packing even if they are a good person and loves you properly, you can't risk them proving you wrong.

How to begin trusting others again? Tarot: Same Cards

Learning to trust your intuition. Learn to have discernment that when something doesn't feel good, right, or doesn't make you feel loved it's time to move on. Know it's okay to extend grace when the issues that are happening are a human error and not a character flaw. Anything that is a character flaw (narcissism, manipulating, lack of concern for you, etc) should not be tolerated whereas human flaws like (things that most of everyone does from time to time and they own up to it) are okay because at the end of the day we are all human and sometimes make a mistake. Being cruel, mean, etc is not a mistake and is very much intentional and this is behavior to move away from.

What good can come from trusting again? Oracle Cards: Grieving, Forgiveness, Clarity, Compassion

Because of your past or even current reality for some of you, you have lacked compassion for yourself and possibly even fallen into a deep depression when you think about the times you let someone treat you horribly or even less than what you have deserved. Once you begin to heal this, you will begin to show yourself more compassion as you now know what to accept and what not to. You will also know that what you didn't know before you now know to do better and continue to do better while showing the old you compassion, for what you lacked. You will also forgive others if not yourself again for the treatment that they have given you and forgiveness towards yourself. Clarity will also be a gift as you will no longer see every red flag through rose-colored glasses but exactly as they are keeping you safe and way from those who want to do harm or be toxic.

Pile lll:

What is preventing me from trusting others including myself? Tarot: The Fool, Three of Swords, Four of Swords, The Star, Ten of Swords.

Romantic Relationships. There are two songs that come to mind with you, pile lll and that's Bleeding Love by Leona Lewis and Fool for You by Cee-lo Green. You are a fool for love pile lll to the point you keep getting hurt over and over again and many of you lose sleep because of past partners always wondering who they are with, if they are coming home, if they are talking to other people. I can see you always by your phone hoping that they will call or text and when they don't you are disappointed because, in the back of your head, you have/had a feeling they are texting someone else, someone you believe might be "better" than you and a lot of you tolerate this for so long until you can't any longer. A few of you may have also been drawn to pile ll, if so there maybe something there for you as well even if it's just a sentence. Either way, Love has caused you to lose your trust in others and yourself because you are most likely a hopeless romantic. You are a lover of love and refuse to see or believe in anything other than just that. But I do feel that some of you are coming to your end of being a ride or die, a lover of love, and so forth because you are either tired of experiencing the pain or seeing on social media showcasing the many people out there treating their partners like crap and it's causing you anxiety that you will never find "the one" and you are doomed to be single forever.

How to begin trusting others again? Tarot: Same Cards

This isn't so much of how to begin trusting others again because with the fools card, you are always up for love again you are a lover of love but you are just coming to your end of being this type of person or even being the type where you feel a ride or die is admirable (depending how you view it, it's not). This is more so of a friend-to-friend chat, for those who find it admirable in being a ride-or-die when it comes to partners who aren't shit. That isn't a ride or die....you're just constantly dying because you are wasting so much of your life force worrying they are cheating, etc. Please know it is more admirable to leave than it is to look like a clown because you stuck with someone through "hard times." cheating is not hard times. Going through financial struggles is considered a hard time (only if you both are putting gin the work. If ou are doing the only leg work again this is not hard times or ride or die material). For those who want to give up on love keep pushing and stop listening or looking at social media. I know trust I kept getting weaponized incompetence videos of partners and etc but once I reset my algorithm and kept pressing not interested on videos and only looking at partners being loved and seen I began to have faith that there is real love out there and maybe it will happen for me too. Keep hanging on, you will find the person who will give you 100% and more to you. Have patience.

What good can come from trusting again? Oracle Cards: No Cards

This is more of an intuitive message but you will get everything and more that you want. If you want the house with the picket fence, dog, and kids, and loving husband you have it. Whatever it is that you want out of your love life it is yours for the taking you just need to be smarter about how you go about loving people. Be smarter in how you pour your energy into others as well. Again cheating and receiving poor treatment is not cute sticking around just to say "you held down your partner" because again that is not holding them down. Find the love that makes you feel seen, feel at ease, and worry-free, and pours just as much into you as you do them.

Pile lV:

What is preventing me from trusting others including myself? Tarot: Six of Cups, Nine of Pentacles, Six of Wands, Eight of Swords.

Childhood Wounds. Something happened in your childhood to where you didn't feel safe enough to be great, express yourself, or even feel as if you could make something of yourself financially. For some of you, you may have had that parent who told you they wanted to hold onto your money for you but then turn around and spend it. Whatever it is that caused you to lose trust during childhood it's deeply affecting your adulthood as if one wrong move and the worse is about to happen. You know how Chidi from The Good Place TV series (amazing show) would become so indecisive about a decision to the point it caused his death because it would debilitate him...I'm sensing that from this pile. I wish I knew what it was from childhood that caused you to feel as if you can't move on with your life and live it freely, abundantly, and so forth but again this is a general reading and also the energy feels like a shut door as if not even you like to open it. You may also suffer from remembering some of your childhood because it was so traumatizing. While you remember some of the bad times, other times that caused you to feel some type of way won't unlock itself except once in a blue moon.

How to begin trusting others again? Tarot: Same Cards

Facing your trauma head-on. If this isn't an option or you know that it wouldn't do any good remember that you are an adult and for those of you who aren't remember that you are your own person and you don't need any approval outside of yourself. Believe in the things that you set your mind to. If you believe you will and can be a billionaire don't tell those who do nothing but put you down...keep it to yourself and harvest that feeling so it can grow. Believe that you are capable of doing and being anything that you set your mind to. For some of you, this is more than a mental thing but more so having parents who think how you dress, look, act, etc is a phase, "of the devil", or whatnot. If you are an adult...please cut the cord and live for yourself. If you still live at home and are not an adult....this maybe a bit tricky as not everyone has the privilege to do as you please. Just remember who you are as a person and know that nothing is wrong with you. There is so much I can go on about but again that would be long and this is too much of a general reading for that.

What good can come from trusting again? Oracle Cards: Freedom, Peace, Lighten Your Load, & Beauty.

As mentioned some of you could have childhood wounds or could be currently going through it if you are still a child (under 18) where your family criticizes you for your style, weight, etc once you release your need for approval or even stop listening to the naysayers you will come into your own and fully embrace yourself relieving this load that you no longer have to listen or can tune out those who constantly put you down because of their own issues and problems with themselves Lastly of course freedom is something you will experience. You will have so much freedom you won't know what to do of once you release this wound or leave your childhood house.

Thank you to everyone who supports not only my Patreon but also my Etsy and Tumblr page. Much love and blessings to you all.

Stay Safe and Be Blessed :)

[doyoulikethis-videogame-song]

Ask Masterpost 1/25/2024

I will be answering the BLOG RELATED asks that I have received since opening my inbox. Lucky number three this finally becomes consistent :).

I would like to state here that even though I don't respond to them (I'm persnickety about keeping ask spam low) I very much appreciate everyone's well wishes and compliments and gratefulness for this blog. I screenshot all of them and keep them in a folder. Thank you so much and I hope you keep having fun :).

@forrest-knight asked: Hello! I am here to ask for some clarification regarding the rules: “Songs from multimedia series that are primarily NOT video games (such as the Homestuck minigames, for example) will not be accepted.” I’m a bit confused with this rule, does this mean we’re not allowed to submit songs from licensed video games (aka games made for non video game media), even if the song is originally made for the game (ex. To The Moon from the DuckTales NES game). Or does this rule is intended for something completely different? *please note that I’ve never read homestuck, so this might relate to my confusion Anyways, thank you so much for doing this! And I hope you have a great whatever time you are reading this!

SO Homestuck was the only example I could think of at the time as a series that actually did this. I was specifically thinking about franchises/series/works that 100% did not start off intending to be a video game but, in the nature of being a multimedia series, added video game minigames or mobile games as it developed.

This is referring to things like homestuck (a webcomic that featured small browser/flash games within the comic), many idol gacha games** (hypnosis mic, love live), etc. This does not include series that were 'completed' (loosely used since I know many of these frequently get universe-expanding sequels and threequels and whathaveyou) and then had video game spinoffs, such as Star Wars, Marvel, etc.

** exceptions being tracks that are exclusively used in the video game itself, such as BGM.

I know this rule is probably the most complicated one and I'm still trying to figure out how to word it clearly and precisely LMAO. Fundamentally it comes down to intent, which is why I'm still on the fence some things like tracks used exclusively in promotional materials and things like that.

That being said: if the song is originally from a video game as in literally you can hear it while you are playing the video game you are totally in the clear

And according to your second ask (I won't name the songs in case you want to submit them): The one made for and coming from the NES game is fine (of course), AND the one that is the 8-bit version of the NON-VGM one is ALSO FINE, because it was REMIXED for the NES game :).

-----

**NUMEROUS QUESTIONS ABOUT PUTTING DISCLAIMERS ASKING PEOPLE NOT TO SPOIL THE SONGS**

The blind listening and polling period is just for fun! If someone really likes a song and wants to know what it is/where it's from, PLEASE feel free to tell them!!! And PLEASE always enter the notes with the expectation that there may be song spoilers!!

I will ask that you keep it in the TAGS rather than the comments or reblogs (you're more than welcome to DM people the title if they ask), just for the sake of people who might want to discuss the song without spoilers. I'll put that in the pinned and the (eventual...) formal rules.

-----

What's up! New here so sorry if this has been asked before but has the exact same song been submitted more than once before? Like it's clearly different people but the same song keeps getting submitted over and over again?

Ever since Mod Rae cleared duplicates I have no idea anymore, BUT I know there have been a lot of different submissions for a few select Disco Elysium songs. That doesn't shock me because I know it's got a cult following here :).

-----

do you get a lot of the same people in ur notes or is it like. a few of the same and then it branches out to fandoms where people know the song? or do u not pay attn to your notes at all (also fair)

I do read the notes (when I remember)! I really like hearing people's opinions, and I always look through the tags on songs I know (I find it really hilarious seeing 'is this dark souls?' 'is this nier?' on any orchestral ever). There are a lot of familiar faces but I'd say the majority for any given poll are new or sparsely in the notes :).

-----

Would you ever consider adding two more "i dont feel strongly/have an opinion" options to the polls? Specifically, "it sounds familiar and i dont have an opinion" and "ive def heard it before and dont feel strongly/have an opinion"? Of course, if theres a specific reason why you dont add those two as options, feel free to ignore this, ty <3

I've considered this -- but honestly, that button has always existed as more of a 'I just want to click a button' option than an actual datapoint I'm looking for (I think I might have answered an ask similar to this before but I don't remember so I'm answering it again LOL). When that option dominates, I always read the notes and tags for discussion and I'd encourage anyone who is genuinely interested to do the same. Actual complex opinions, of course, cannot be captured with the limitations of preset poll options anyways LMFAO.

-----

@mkcannothelpyou asked: I'm beginning to wonder if spacing series severely further apart and prioritising picks further down the queue that aren't as represented would make for a more interesting order - as it is, it feels like you can more or less still track what people submitted and when, with waves of series (and closely related works within those series, at that) coming in conspicuously densely. Hearing the same style only days apart might impact poll results for the negative as time goes on.

This was mostly the fault of me allowing people to submit multiple songs at once, leading to songs with similar qualities (as they are all liked by one person with a particular taste) being grouped together, even if they're from different series. I limit submissions to one per period now so this will not be a problem in the future :').

-----

@the-mayor-of-space asked: how long do submissions typically stay open once they are open?

I originally wanted to have them permanently opened (thinking people wouldn't mind waiting for their submissions) until I got an insane amount of submissions, severely underestimating the popularity of this blog. I then tried to do a 24 hr submission period, and then a 12 hr submission period, but both of these still ended up with a fuck ton of submissions so the current answer is 'They're closed until I can figure out something proper'...

I don't want purging the existing submissions to be on the table, but if I get to the 1 year anniversary of this blog without a better option I might have to go that route -- in which case I'd probably publish all the unposted options so people know if theirs was cut so they know to resubmit it if they're still interested.

-----

**NUMEROUS QUESTIONS ABOUT HOW FAR BACK THE SUBMISSIONS ARE**

WE'RE FINALLY IN AUGUST!!!!!!!!

-----

are fan/non official/non licensed versions of songs allowed? because i am 100% certain #293 is a fan made remaster and medley arrangement (im not the submitter but i know the song well - i found the youtube video the audio is from and the comments from OP confirm it is a fan remix). if they are, that's totally cool, but i couldn't find anything in the submission rules about it. i dont intend this ask to be rude or hostile at all, and either way im grateful you've created such an active community with this blog!

They're not really allowed unless they're from a mod or fangame. Since it's a fanmade remaster it's kind of towing the line, so I'm not inherently against it, but it might end up just being a highly situational thing.

Note: I'm not familiar with Fire Emblem at ALL but I knew this particular song was from an older game, which is why I wasn't opposed to posting the remastered version. In any future submissions I'd appreciate if this sort of thing were indicated just in case! I will add that to the submission guidelines :). And of course if there's a better way to go about this (i.e if the game is like, 30+ years old fanmade remasters/upscales are permitted or something like that) I will make sure that's made clear as well :).

-----

sorry if you've answered this before but I was just wondering, are people allowed to submit spoiler songs for the polls? like final boss songs and songs from endings and secret endings

Absolutely! But I think for all future submissions (this doesn't apply now since there's a huge backlog) I might put a hold on the submissions of OSTS from new games for like 1-2 months (i.e No Mario Kart 9 OSTs until two months after the game drops!) so people who are playing/going to play the game have time to play it before hearing the OSTs unprompted.

-----

@its-daisukenojobito asked: Just out of curiosity, do you prefer the more obscure submissions, or more well known? I feel like for the sake of reach, the more well known the better, but as a participant, i love being able to hear something I wasn't expecting, and knowing it!

I have no preference, but it's always fun hearing good stuff from games and series I've literally never heard of!

-----

@venonomnomicon asked: am i allowed to DM to check the status of a submission? it was a couple of months ago though i do respect it's probably just deep in the queue as you get hundreds of submissions a month lol

Absolutely, but you'll have to DM my main blog (@himejoshi) because apparently tumblr doesn't let you have DMs when you have more than one blog admin.

-----

@royvalentine asked: is the form supposed to be only submittable once?

Yes, so people would only submit one song per submission period. I intended to make a new form for every submission period... There just hasn't been one since.

-----

hi question, do pinball tables count as video games?

I don't think I have enough experience to answer this question... What do y'all think????

[dyingswanpavlova]

Hey to all you lovely people,

I hope you're doing great!

I'm just quickly posting this to let you know that I'll try to upload Part 11 within the next two days! As well as answer all your sweet, lovely messages!

I had quite the eventful weekend and I haven't really been able to get anything done today, so if I didn't manage to reply yet, I totally will and I'm not ignoring/forgetting anyone! No one assumed that, I'm just an over-thinker and I want to make sure you know!

Every message I receive, every kind word and everyone who takes the time to think about the story/me means incredibly much to me! That's why I intend to answer everything! I just didn't find the time yet and I don't want to answer anyone out of brief obligation, but to take the time and the love that I want and wish to give back to you. 🤍 And the same goes for Part 11!

I love you, guys. Have a great day/night and a lovely start into the new week! 🤍

[bitchface24-7]

Could you do part 2 of Yanderes Viktor and Jayce, please... What would it be like if the reader chose one of the boys to follow?

(Maybe you could do what it would be like for each route, for Yanderes Jayce and Viktor)

THE CHOICE IS NO LONGER YOURS PT 2 - VIKTOR X READER | JAYCE X READER

synopsis: you couldn't choose who to side with, so they decided for you. Here are the routes if you went with either Viktor or Jayce. Hopefully, everything goes well…

warnings: yandere V + J, possession, obsession, suggestiveness, angst, Grammarly is my beta

genre: m/f or m/m

p.s. this is pt2 to “It’s time to choose…” but I wanted to name it something different that still applies to the first fic. Thisll be under pt1 in my masterlist. Hope y'all enjoy our boys being unhinged for us!

VIKTOR X READER

You don't know who to choose, so they choose for you.

Viktor takes one of your hands and leads you out the lab as you look back and see an enraged Jayce watching you two. His jaw is clenched and his fists are shaking at his side.

Viktor just continues to walk, ignoring everything around him but you. He ignored the people in the academy, the people out and about in Piltover, and walks down to Zaun.

He heals Huck, he becomes a well-known miracle, a desperate plea many have prayed for. He heals the land, builds a forge, and a commune. He becomes a messiah. He becomes the Herald.

And you're right there by his side. You're his. His right hand, his partner, his heart. Everyone knows not to mess with you. You're essentially royalty to the commune.

You help Viktor keep his humanity, your very presence fights back against the arcane. The arcane whispers to Viktor to be rid of you, he’ll never listen to it.

You're his and his alone, nothing will change his mind.

He cares for you, loves you, and worships you. He's unbelievably perfect. Sometimes you miss Jayce, and you tell Viktor. He always grimaces and looks upset, but he admits the same.

Vi, Jinx, Isha, and Vander show up for some healing, it almost works. Then everything kind of goes wrong. You fight, you live, your life continues on.

The two of you are quite happy at the commune, until Jayce shows up to kill Viktor.

You won't let that happen.

He's yours, and you're his.

JAYCE X READER

You don't know who to choose, so they choose for you.

Jayce's arm wraps around your waist as Viktor leaves solemnly. You ache to reach out and grab him, force him to stay; but Jayce's grip on you is too tight.

The two of you are despondent as you watch Viktor’s frame exits into the darkness of the unknown.

The two of you have work to do.

You aimlessly search and research into the arcane. You try your best to find the answers you are desperately seeking.

You don't find it.

Then you go on a wild goose chase with Jayce, Ekko, and Heimerdinger, getting touched by the arcane, and you all split up.

Ekko and Heimerdinger are no where to be found as you and Jayce are transported to a post-apocalyptic version of Piltover.

Its horrifying, terrifying. The humanoid monsters, the wasteland that was once the city of progress. You're not sure how it happened, everything was happening to fast for you to process anything; but you both fall into a cave of a canyon. Two massive rock walls surrounding you, and the only way to escape is up.

Jayce cushioned your fall, and his hammer broke his leg. You try your best to care for him, but there aren’t many supplies you can use.

The two of you get extremely close. Huddling for warmth alongside the fire, tending to his leg and helping him destroy his hammer to make a brace, carving on the wall as you feel like you’re losing your mind, crying together.

Eventually the two of you slowly climb the rocks, helping each other out to the best of your abilities. The two of come across a stone figure that looks eerily familiar, and a mage that shares a face with a man you thought you’d never see again.

He tells you that in all timelines, and all possibilities, only we could show him this. And that we must stop him.

We must kill him.

The stone figure gives Jayce a modified version of his hammer, and you’re sent back to your timeline.

Your bond is intrinsic, unshakeable. But the two of you hesitate to harm Viktor. He’s changed, but he’s still your partner.

You’ll stick by Jayce no matter what, but you can’t be there when he kills Viktor. You almost lost Jayce and freaked out, you don’t know what you’ll do if you see a friend die.

But you’re Jayce’s rock, his pillar, his shield. You’ll be there to pick the broken pieces up.

He’s yours, and you’re his.

Jayce’s is longer accidentally. I did just post about herald Viktor x reader and I guess my brain went “i don’t think many people want to read the same thing twice.” So yeah… hope y’all enjoyed this pt2!! ❤️❤️

[tarotmundomonde]

First of half of 2025 will you officially start dating

Yes or no and a short explanation :)

pick a number 1-5 OR an emoji 🤎 💚 🤍 🖤 💙

(ps. this reading is for practice and for fun)

1.🤎 The answer is yes. It looks like most likely this is someone you know, who's been around for a while, it could even be a friend. It doesn't seem like this will surprise you. To be honest, it looks more like you've been single for a long time and just want to have someone. Like dating for the sake of dating, just to get things moving, have things happening. So giving it a chance. It's like you know this person and decide to be open to hang out and get to know each other more and see, if it can go somewhere. It seems that one main reason is truly that there isn't much going on, no options really and no manifestations. Even if you do manifestations, they are not working. So like said, it's like dating for the sake of dating.

2.💚 The answer is no. It looks like there is a variety of reasons to why. If you are into someone not available, it does look like you will drop it. If you simply don't have time, you seem to enjoy life as it is. But it looks like you do have new beginnings coming in, possibilities to connect and new possible connections that can lead to something later on. And one thing to mention is that there could or will be someone around you that you could be interested in and it looks like there will be an opening. For example if you are classmates, you might suddenly end up in the same group, working on a project together and that will open the door for possibilities.

3.🤍 The answer is yes. If you know this person, it's someone you've never talked with, no direct replies, no direct messages. But it looks like, as you read this you might already know, who this could end up being. If it's someone you haven't met yet, it looks like you'll somehow know, when you see them, like you'll just know this is the person. There will be this instant "click", inner knowing. You'll feel something special. It's a little difficult to explain, but there is this magical feeling to it. The more you see each other, the more you spend time together, it's kinda like you grow on each other. It's like it just feels natural and comfortable and there is this pull, wanting to be around each other, liking each other's company. It's a sweet feel good energy. It will take a while, however, it will be your person, who will say let's start dating.

4.🖤 The answer is yes. It looks like your energy will be stronger than usually. People notice you and someone will be brave enough to express their interest in you, flirting with you. And frankly, it looks like you like their looks and you decide to give it a chance. I think there will be heavy flirting first. Like for real heavy flirting. And it looks like it will feel natural to be around each other and flirting with each other. They might kiss you before you start dating. You'll really, really dig the physical aspect. Like the flirting, kissing, affection, you'll both love it. There will be strong attraction. Also, really heavy sexual energy & attraction. There is going to be a sense of you've found your type of person, they've found their type of person. You'll both think you've found someone you could call "my person".

5.💙 The answer is yes. This could be an ex or simply someone, who previously rejected you. But it's someone you really desire, you find them hot. It looks like when they come back they had quite a tough ending with whoever they were dating. And now they come back to you looking for a distraction, for a rebound. It looks like you'll end up together, because you have doubts about what if you missed out on something. Like a fear of loss and missing out. And a sense of better something than nothing.

[abbysimsfun]

Sims In Bloom: Generation 2 Pt. 131 (The Gold Medallion)

Heather and Spencer were both grateful when the antidote arrived by morning. Spencer met a local merchant near the cantina for the medicine while Heather stayed in bed to rest. Once she drank it she felt better, if still a little nauseous, but after lunch the girls decided to venture to the museum.

They set up a few dig sites and found a few relics, but when the sun got too hot, the women changed into sundresses.

Finally, the sun was so hot they gave up digging and took shelter inside the museum. Walking through different rooms to view the priceless artifacts on display, Heather stopped when her phone beeped with an incoming text.

Suri keeps talking about getting married after her Aunt Elsa's death and I think she's going to propose to me. What should I say?!?

(I know that's not what the pop up says, but if I make these canon, they can't all be the same scenario as a ring in a bag!)

Heather was surprised to learn Hazel and Suri were already thinking about marriage, and she didn't feel equipped to offer advice one way or another.

This is a big decision and you should decide this for yourself, Dandelion. Love you.

She thought her answer more than sufficient, but Hazel was clearly upset and texted back quickly.

I thought I could really rely on you for life advice, sis. If I knew what to do, I wouldn't have to ask.

Heather frowned. That definitely could have gone better.

"Hey Heather, come in here. Come look at this."

She put her phone away and found Spencer in a stone-walled room, standing before a diamond-studded gold medallion inside a glass display. A plaque on the wall revealed the medallion's inscription - found deep inside the Selvadoradian jungle decades earlier, the medallion was inscribed "A gift from Malcom A. Landgraab to Lady Victorine Goth."

Spencer chuckled. "A Lady Goth and a Landgraab? That's a wild combination."

Heather froze. "Lady Victorine Goth and Malcolm A. Landgraab? How old is this necklace?"

"They think it's from the early 20th Century," Spencer read. "Malcolm A. Landgraab was a rancher out west, and Lady Victorine Goth was Lady Ravendancer before her marriage, one of the world's most powerful spellcasters who published a book of spells. But both were married to other people and there's no evidence they ever knew each other."

"Other than this necklace," Heather mused. "I should ask Mortimer Goth about it. Maybe he knows something about them."

"Do you think it'll have something to do with the curse?"

Heather shrugged. "Hopefully there's no curse, but if there is, and it does have something to do with it, I have to know more for Ash's sake."

Despite taking the antidote, Heather still felt feverish and fatigued. They headed back to the rental so she could take a nap, and Spencer took the time to analyze some of her new artifacts.

By dinnertime, Heather was feeling peckish, so they returned to the square for a nice evening in town with the locals. Heather remembered Conrad's fear that they could run into members of Los Tigres de Selva, but she was feeling well enough to really enjoy herself and didn't want to waste the opportunity.

The night was warm, so they both dressed accordingly. On the way into the square, Spencer made an offering to the statue of Madre Cosecha, a Selvadoradian custom.

"She helped settle this place during a time of great famine," explained Spencer. "A true hero. Hopefully she can help keep us safe on our temple dig tomorrow."

Heather smiled. "We should stock up on more supplies, anyway. She would want us to protect ourselves and I don't need another spider bite."

They enjoyed arepas under the lights and chatted proudly about their kids. "Violet gets into everything, and she's got her older brothers wrapped around her grubby little fingers."

"She sounds a lot like Lavender. One minute she's sitting quietly looking through a book, and the next minute she's tearing through the bookshelf. And Ash has me convinced I could design an adventure game featuring stray pets. I even reached out to a philanthropist who loves to help game developers as a hobby named Cal Anthony, Jr. Suri actually recommended him - he's married to her mother's cousin, Olivia - but he said this was totally doable and he'd be happy to mentor me anytime. I think I might actually do it. I even have a name - Furever Friends: Stray Valley. I couldn't decide which I liked better so I added a colon to use both!"

"That sounds amazing, Heather. I'm sure my kids would love to play a game like that! How are things with you and Ash's dad these days?"

"As good as they've ever been, probably. Even when we dated. It's sort of strictly professional between us, but Ash comes home happy from spending time with Malcolm's family, so I can't complain. I guess they just got a new puppy, too."

"The kids won't stop trying to convince us to get another dog," Spencer moaned. "I think we're hoping to change their minds with a hamster, if anything."

When they finished eating, they moved to the cantina, where Heather decided to autonomously mix drinks at the crowded bar. Spencer danced the Selvadoradian rhumba in the courtyard while she talked Omiscan mythology with the locals. She was an expert in Selvadoradian customs after all her time spent in the temples and among the people, and she never tired of talking about the secrets of Selvadorada's past.

Their night continued until Heather began to feel feverish and fatigued again. Though the antidote had seemed to work, the women didn't want to take any chances and called it a night.

As long as Heather was feeling well enough, they had a temple to explore before returning home. ->

<- Previous Chapter | Gen 2 Start | Gen 2.1 Summary

Gen 1 Start | Gen 1 Summary

Landgraab Curse you say?! More on that, here, if you want to know more.

A massive shout out to @opalsimmer and @berrysims-lp, whose sims Lucia, Silas, Neve, and Terrell first saw this medallion inside the Selvadorada museum! I recreated it in my game with @opalsimmer's help and intend to explore this mysterious Landgraab/Goth lore. (Uncovering some family secrets, of course!)

And thank you @oimygiblets for letting me make Calivia Forever canon even though your story takes place about three decades before mine!! And @opalsimmer and @matchalovertrait for naming Heather's video game! 🙌🙌🙌

[420technoblazeit]

I mean this 100% genuinely: will you sell me on melvik?

I want to ship them but they had criminally few interactions in the show and the interactions weren’t super positive. However, I’m a huge fan of their parallels and think if they had been allowed to have more time together maybe they could’ve gotten closer. I also like them both with Jayce and want all permutations of meljayvik to be happy, not just meljay and jayvik.

I hope this doesn’t come across as me showing up to your house and bashing your ship cause that is not my intention. I genuinely WANT to be sold on melvik. I think my eyes can be opened to it if I hear from melvik shippers

No pressure to answer this either tho. If nothing else I just want to say thank you for all you do for the jayvik and meljavik tumblr ecosystems 🙏🙏🙏 I appreciate you 🫡

ok so the important thing to note about my melvik shipping is im coming at this from a kismesis angle. and if youre not familiar with homestuck shipping dynamics the key part in those kinds of relationships is commitment in helping the other person be better. seeing their flaws and wanting to help them with those flaws in a sometimes meddlesome kind of way. it's not so much built on hatred, as most people think it is, but this sense of i can fix them and i want to commit to helping them be better

my view of mel and viktor's relationship is that mel comes from a very privileged background and in truth has turned a blind eye to injustice in the past because she was fixated on living up to the standards of a medarda. she probably could have done more to help the people of the undercity. but both because she was intent on helping piltover become a more prosperous nation and because she hadn't entirely broken from the expectations of her family, that wasn't a priority for her. and i think viktor would naturally disapprove of that to some extent as someone who grew up in zaun and felt the effects of that kind of ignorance firsthand. viktor on the other hand has adopted a very pacifist and idealistic stance of no violence at any cost. this is probably due in part to his upbringing and the violence he was exposed to when he was younger. and if you want to point to what was basically their only scene together in season 1 i think part of their relationship is that mel views that kind of ideology as a little unrealistic in the grand scheme of things. mel was raised to watch her back at every turn and expect resistance and that would maybe lead her to clash with viktor's principles

but the big thing here and what really sells me on this ship i think is that despite these differences mel and viktor seem to have a LOT of respect for each other. they are both at their core outsiders in piltover, people who never really felt at home there. mel was exiled from noxus but misses it desperately to the point of painting it and dreaming of it constantly. viktor presumably has no one left to miss in zaun but returns there when he fuses with the hexcore because he still wants to help the people he left. they've both faced hardship and seen so much conflict in their lives and because of that chosen peace because they don't want anyone else to experience what they have. they're also both incredibly committed to progress and innovation and share a passion for helping people. i don't think viktor would have accepted mel as a collaborator if he didn't genuinely think that she was better than the other council members. and in the same way mel wouldn't have funded hextech if she didn't think that technology was something worth pursuing. and i really do think their differences could help the other see a perspective that they wouldn't have otherwise. does that make sense? as you can see i am Normal about these two

[cosmerelists]

Which Misting Should You Ask To Help With Each of Your Household Chores?

As requested by @actual22plus :)

So...you have Mistings as your roommates. When it comes time to set up that chore wheel, here is my advice as to who should handle what!

1. Dusting: Steel Misting (Coinshot)

You know how there are always those cobwebs high up on the ceiling that are difficult to reach? Well, that will no longer be a problem once a Coinshot handles your dusting! They'll be tossing coins on the floor and leaping high into the air, getting ALL of those hard to reach corners!

2. Vacuuming: Iron Misting (Lurcher)

You'll want your Lurcher to do the vacuuming, though--mostly because the carpet is now full of metal coins and the Lurcher should probably allomantically collect those before the vacuum cleaner breaks. Again.

3. Grocery Shopping: Pewter Misting (Thug)

You don't have to worry about being able to carry in all the groceries in one trip if a Thug is handling it! They'll carry all 11 of the shopping bags without breaking a sweat, even the one with the gallon of milk in it!

4. Dish Washing: Tin Misting (Tineye)

With their keen senses, a Tineye will make sure that the dishes are well and truly clean. They'll also replace the sponge. Like, a lot. You used to keep using the same sponge for at least three months, but the Tineye keeps saying that it "smells funny" and is "full of horrible bacteria." Well, they probably know best.

5. Laundry: Zinc Misting (Rioter)

Well...they don't exactly do the laundry. They help with laundry by standing by you as you put the clothes away, inflaming your emotions so that you temporarily care really hard about putting away laundry so that it doesn't feel like the worst thing in the world. W-Wait, did they just trick you into doing their chore?!

6. Answering the Door: Brass Misting (Soother)

Whether it's the HOA or that guy who keeps trying to convince you to switch to AT&T Fiber, it's always best to have the Soother answer the door to make the person calmly go away (if necessary).

7. Setting up the VPN: Copper Misting (Smoker)

Okay, so it's not the...biggest job, but a Smoker is all about security, right? Normally it's their job to hide allomantic pulses, so it only makes sense for them to also hide your illegal downloads, right?

8. General Cleanup: Bronze Misting (Seeker)

Try this: "There may not be allomantic pulses for you to sense right now, but I bet you can seek out all the stuff that hasn't been put away! Ha ha! Please put away your socks they've been under the table for three weeks."

9. Taking out the Trash: Aluminum Misting (Aluminum Gnat)

Try this: "You're good at wiping the internal reserves of someone's metal, and that's a lot like cleaning out the internal reserves of our trash can!" Then look them deeply in the eyes and say, "I, for one, don't think your power is useless!" Maybe then someone will take out the trash for once!

10. Wiping down Surfaces: Chromium Misting (Leecher)

Try this: "You're good at wiping the reserves of an external target, and I bet that makes you great at wiping down these dusty external surfaces with a damp rag!" Then look them deeply in the eyes and say, "I know you don't want to be a leech." Wait, don't say that. That sounds really insulting.

11. Catching the Bugs and Putting Them Outside: Duralumin Misting (Duralumin Gnat)

Try this: "As a Gnat, I bet you're really good at catching bugs by thinking like bugs! Ha ha! Anyway, can you please catch that centipede? It's been here so long we've taken to calling it Mr. Wiggles but it really should be free outside lest it crawl over our faces in the night." I'm sure your friend the Duralumin Gnat will just be glad to have a job...right?

12. Picking a Good Playlist: Nicrosil Misting (Nicroburst)

If there is one thing a Nicroburst is good at, it's giving other people an extra burst of allomantic energy! That's kind of like picking the cleaning playlist that will get everyone jazzed up for cleaning, right?

13. Cooking: Bendalloy Misting (Slider)

The worst part of cooking is that once you decide you want food, you then have to take some time and prepare it. Unless, of course, your Slider is doing it! Then the time between "Hey does anyone want tacos?" and having delicious tacos appear before you is no time at all! Brilliant!

14. Waiting for Package: Cadmium Misting (Pulser)

Have you ever been so desperate for your package to arrive that you would be willing to hang out with your friendly Pulser while time passes extra fast outside of your bubble--sure, maybe several days pass in the blink of an eye but at least you get your package faster! O-Oh? You've never been that desperate for package? Well, I'm sure we'll find something else for the Pulser to do! ...Dammit, I think we made the Pulser cry.

15. Shaming Roommates for Not Doing Their Chores: Gold Misting (Auger)

"Look at what might have been," whispers the Auger, appearing behind the Coinshot like a wraith, "If you had actually dusted last week." As the vision of the spotless apartment flashes before the Coinshot's eyes, they begin to weep. Never again will they forget to dust.

16. Assigning the Chores: Electrum Misting (Oracle)

"Due to my ability to see the future," the Oracle intones, "no one is better than me at choosing who will be best to do which chores."

Later you learn that burning electrum just allows this person to see the shadows of what a person is about to do...which isn't exactly like seeing the future...and also they didn't exactly assign themselves a chore...but by then it's too late.

Maybe living with sixteen individual Mistings was a mistake?

[pressplay-if]

What takeaway do you want readers to get from your story? Is there something we should be looking for?

you know, I thought about this quite a bit, and I have come to the conclusion that...

I don't know. I don't have a good answer. I know I want people to get some sort of value out of this that goes beyond "yeah I clicked a few buttons and read an okay story" but I couldn't say what else, exactly.

Life very often feels like a storm, and music and writing made it so that I, personally, could brave the weather when it was particularly harsh. If anything, I want to share this appreciation to shine through in this IF, and if it connects to anyone else in the same way it does to me while I'm writing it, then that would be great as well. I'm not exactly in the habit of hiding meanings in my writing, although that might make me sound sort of anti-intellectual...

Mainly, I'm just trying to capture the feeling and the dynamic of a group of people trying to make art around their various issues, and how these people break and mend themselves back together time and time again. I just hope anyone who reads that will like the way they (MC, Stevie, Angel, Lin and Zima) go about it. Of course I'm also trying to convey what it's like when your mind is actively working against you... Eh. I don't know. I have much thoughts, very jumbled. It sounds like I'm trying to sound deep but I don't... It's really not that deep, I recognize that.

Anyway, thanks for the ask! Really gave me stuff to think about.

[utilitycaster]

i keep seeing people say that OF COURSE Bell Hell's haven't grown or changed, it's only been 3 months in campaign! and it's been nonstop! and every time I see that, I gotta admit 1. okay so you admit they haven't grown, cool. 2. that feels like a watsonian answer to a not-quite-watsonian complaint. iirc, m9 were only a few months longer than BH by the time their campaign ended, and it's been pretty comparable irl time. Both bell's bells and m9 had significantly less 'in world' time than vm and the m9 grew and changed plenty.

Because there's a discrepancy between 'time in game' and 'time at the table' for actual play, using 'in game' time as an excuse for...anything, feels thin. Because it still FEELS like three years both to us and the players! Does that make any sense or am i losing my mind? cause every time i see answers like that I feel a little crazy for feeling like it's almost entirely unrelated to complaint they're trying to address

No, it makes complete sense. I discussed this here as well but on some level it's like ok so they haven't changed! Turns out they suck, and the fact that they haven't changed means we have a party that still sucks. Like, if your point is "I don't like this character trait", someone saying "well it makes sense for them to have it" doesn't fix the core problem of you not liking it. This is a repeated problem in discussions in this campaign. I think Liliana dying would have been narratively interesting; I literally give zero fucks whether it's deserved, because she isn't real and I'm not a believer in Calvinism nor instant karma in real life and plenty of people die for unfair reasons and I happen to really enjoy exploring that and how people respond to it in fiction. You can't have a conversation with someone who, when you say "I'm not a big fan of vanilla ice cream, do you have chocolate?" says "but vanilla is literally a complex flavor made from orchids?" (Also yes, the Mighty Nein are a great example of a party who were already more closely bonded about a month and a half in, following Molly's death; the entire campaign was almost a year long though a bit shorter in terms of time together due to Happy Fun Ball time dilation. For reference, Bells Hells have been together 4 months and 5 days, and the Mighty Nein, at that exact same amount of time, were exploring the second Uk'otoa temple, and a number of them were already rethinking their whole deal at that point.)

I don't currently have any original posts to make re: criticism of Campaign 3 until next episode, most likely - I'm reblogging well-made posts I see, and obviously I'm answering asks, but I said this more briefly in the tags of another post earlier and I'd like to elaborate, but this has been a problem for me, at least, the entire campaign:

Campaign 3 has a small but loud contingent of fans who are utterly incapable of tolerating the idea that other people hold different opinions than they do and post them on their own blogs (often even not in the main tag). They respond to this with abuse and harassment; with a constant switching of direction to the point of self-contradiction; and with doubling and tripling down on statements I personally find to be bigoted. They are, in my opinion, small-minded, unintelligent, self-absorbed people who are so locked into, as I said here, an Us vs. Them mentality that so long as there is anyone who doesn't like them they will never be happy. They have gotten, narratively, almost everything they wanted thus far, but they'll never be happy so long as someone openly disagrees with them. Like, if the fact that your ship is the most popular one for this campaign on ao3 is so important to you, why are you so pressed about a few people disliking it? If liking Campaign 3 means you're a good anticolonial leftist and you're therefore allowed as a white person to mock the experiences of any nonwhite person actively dealing with the consequences of colonialism why do you need the support of The Bad People Who Don't Like It? If you can be broken by anything less than universal adoration, then, well. Break, bitch.

Essentially, think "the personality of Elon Musk in a broke 20-something whose main interests are cartoons aimed at a grade school audience, and a three sentence incorrect summary of Marxist theory that they use to justify whatever they already wanted to do," and you'll get the picture.

My advice therefore is that it's not really worth arguing, and frankly, there would be little to no discourse if they weren't so pathetically insecure that a post saying "The structure, pacing, and message of Campaign 3 are all weak and inconsistent, and Bells Hells have so little motivation they fail to be heroes, villains, nor antiheroes" sends them into an extended tantrum because the OP didn't append the words "I think" or "I feel" at the beginning of every statement, as most of us assume any reasonable adult would understand that a person posting on their own blog is posting their own opinions. (And, frankly, appending those words doesn't really help half the time because most of them are ultimately mostly outraged that someone would dare think or feel things that they don't.)

I am making posts about my thoughts on Campaign 3; I think most other people with criticism thereof are doing so as well. I will only be convinced otherwise by Campaign 3 itself being better, and I think it's probably too late for it to do so, and I will not be swayed nor intimidated by people who, see previous paragraphs re: my thoughts. My advice to you and anyone who's saying "wait a second" is to trust your gut; everything you said here seems like a pretty good assessment. If it helps, back away from the fandom and see what you feel without the influence of others (including me!) posting, and go with that.